5 Signs You Played ’90s Hockey
Ah, the ’90s. A simpler time. The internet screamed when it connected, NHL ’94 decided friendships, and your hockey bag smelled like a science experiment that achieved consciousness. If any of this hits a nerve (or your sinuses), congrats—you survived the golden age. Here are five dead giveaways.
1) You Wore a JOFA Bucket with Questionable Foam
The JOFA helmet (aka “the bucket”) sat like a salad bowl on your head while the yellowing foam tried its best to remember what “cushion” meant. Bonus points if you rocked the fishbowl visor and spent the 2nd period squeegeeing fog with your glove. If your chinstrap tasted like old leather and bad decisions… welcome home.
2) Your Twig Was Wood—and It Bit Back
Sher-Wood. KOHO. Christian. Real lumber. You curved blades with a hair dryer or your mom’s kitchen stove (sorry, mom). Splinters? Part of the handshake. Tape jobs looked like mummification, and every slapshot felt like chopping down a small tree. Graphite sticks were “for the rich kids,” and they still broke if you looked at them wrong.
3) Neon Laces & The Gretzky Tuck
If your skates didn’t scream radioactive highlighter, did you even play? Neon laces, colored sock tape, and the iconic one-side jersey tuck told the rink you meant business. Your socks migrated south every shift, and that was the aesthetic. Add a tinted visor and you were basically a 12-year-old NHL All-Star in your mind.
4) Mixtapes + Walkman = Pre-Game Fuel
Your pump-up playlist lived on a scratched Walkman that skipped when you breathed too hard. AC/DC, Metallica, Beastie Boys—rewound with a pencil like a true scholar. If the anti-shock didn’t cut it, you just ran to the bench with “Enter Sandman” playing approximately in time. Art.
5) Street, Roller, Rink—Same Game, Same Bruises
If you didn’t play roller in the cul-de-sac with an orange ball and a busted net, you missed half the season. The garage door had more puck marks than your stat sheet had apples. You still quote Mighty Ducks and swear the Triple Deke is a real system. (It is. Sort of.)
Honorable Mentions
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Don Cherry suits that could blind a goalie through a cage.
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Jaromír Jágr flow so legendary you can still feel the breeze.
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Foam shoulder pads shaped like UFOs.
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Hand-cut stick knobs the size of a tennis ball.
If you’re nodding along, you’re our people. The ’90s were chaotic, honest, and a little dangerous—just like hockey should be. Drop your favorite ’90s memory in the comments, tag @slashhockey with your throwback gear, and keep an eye on our drops—vintage-inspired designs are coming in hot (and a little neon).
